Thursday, January 18, 2007

This time around my job search luck seems really bad. There were some jobs I was really really keen on that I've applied but gotten zero response. Pay told me she waited one month before UOB called her for an interview, well, is that usually the case? I don't really know. Haven't 'rested' for more than 2 weeks in my whole entire 22 years. Only remember working and working.

As I'm typing this I'm also, at the same time, checking JobsDB carefully for opportunities. And the longer I check my morale just dips and dips and dips (happened to you before?) Sigh. What is up with me? Complain when there's work. And when there's no work, feel useless and worried. The feeling really sucks. I mean, both feelings. When I was working it felt damn shitty staying on a job that I don't really like, with no job security (some of you know what I mean) and fantastic monetary benefits. Like, doing it for the sake of doing. Then, when I'm jobless, I'm nervously living on my miserable savings and worrying about not providing for my family and how they would feel and stuff like that, despite friends telling me to take it easy, rest, relax, look around... but the nervousness I get and my decreasing savings is stopping me from relaxing. At the rate I'm going, I don't quite know how and when I will make it big (not big and top of the world but at least, bigger than what I am now) next time. Like I've always said, I don't want to be MF rich or what, my dream was always to be a contented part time job holder and full time homemaker but fuck, everything sucks.

It is the 3rd week of self-made unemployment, self-made because I was the one who quit, I gave myself a maximum of one month to rest, didn't know the stress gets this big on the 3rd week. I find myself getting temperamental and moody too. This is what happens. You stop working and go on the big search for a desired job but most of the time it just doesn't happen. Maybe 10% of the population have the god sent luck to succeed in a career of their choice and live happily ever after, unfortunately, I belong to the 90%. And within this 90%, I suppose 50% will be positive and TRY to accept and enjoy what they are doing, and then live happily ever after, I know I've always belonged to the other 50% who are disgruntled, that's why, I can never seem to make myself STICK to one job and TRY to be happy. I dunno, there is just this fighting feeling inside me that disallows me to accept the job and live like this forever. Yet, I am not resourceful and good enough to find a good job. Gosh, this is getting so wordy but you know what I'm trying to say.



Something to change the topic. The MF demoralizing topic of me being jobless, just a snap of the skies when I was looking out of my window last last evening. Or was it some other evening? I've lost track of time...



And this was another evening, look at the clouds...

I said I'd post more pictures, here goes...


In the train with Jean, this scenario is so cute, the oreo wafer directly next to the uncle, we were fascinated by it (ok I was more)!


Jean and Engracia at the very familar work desk...


Pretty satin red shoe me and Jean saw at ZARA. Price very 'pretty' also. =/

Speaking of shoes, my new Papillios, finally, rather impromptu but real worth... bought last week...


Next up, back to newer pictures - our dinner at Wheelock's Sun and Moon Jap restaurant. Or is it Sun with Moon? Had a light dinner, 5 of us, $50+ only!













Thick and fresh slices I tell you...


Flavored rice with seafood.


The yam thing, I think?


I rate this the BEST. You better try it, the meat is so unbelievably tender!

Dessert at The Big O:



I just thought this looks cute, the menu looks too big for Jean and Shanice...=)


Keagan's mudpie, The Dark Side... All chocolaty...


Shanice's mudpie... forgot the name...


Mine, 'Nuttin' Compares', every bite of the ice-cream has some soft nut, I think it's macademia, and the cake was rather yummy too! You must try if you love nuts. And there's a generous sprinkle of pistachio on top!! I wanna bring ZQ there to have it soon, he loves nuts. That's why he is going out with me (I'm nuts).


Jean's brownie, cake is moist and warm and the ice cream compliments it perfectly!


All in, minus Jean and Engracia's plates. Go on, plan your next dessert feast at The Big O, but I think you can avoid having main course there cos it's pricey and the portion is quite miserable. Past experiences tell for me and Keagan.

SP Colleagues are some of my best colleagues ever in my working life... they just make life seem more bearable... Hugs ya all...

Finally today is Thursday, I prayed for it not to rain so that ZQ's outfield will be easier... and I'm glad it didn't rain, can't wait to see my dd this weekend... Haven't hugged him for one whole week =( Pay is missing her ah heng like me, what a coincidence, both our bfs are from the same camp, reservist and outfield together...

Pre-CNY reunion dinner with Irene and gang next week, time flies! CNY again...

Speaking of Irene, another picture (overdue, yes, I know):


I miss the pinky pink atmosphere filled with love. Notice how the pink in this pict blends in perfectly to my blog skin...

I'll probably get out of the house for some fresh air later. But gotta be home y 7:30pm to catch the Project Superstar Males' Finals... Have a great day folks.